Attraction

This isn't originally mine, and it wasn't in a place I could hit "share" and show you, so I did it as such...

You know, I saw the most interesting show on the Discovery Channel last night.

They were interviewing people who make their living designing attractions for amusement parks like Magic Mountain and Disneyland and Universal Studios. Wouldn't that be a cool way to make a living?

Well, anyway, they were talking about the elements that make up the ideal attraction. They said there are 3 parts to the ideal attraction. First, when you experience the ideal attraction, you feel a state of high arousal. The ideal attraction makes your heart beat faster, and your breathing gets faster and you just feel that amazing rush all over.

And then they said that another part to an ideal attraction is - it's fascinating. You just feel so enthralled that you want to take this ride multiple times; as soon as you get off you want to get back on again.

And they said, finally, the most important element, is a sense of overall safety. That even though the attraction may look a little dangerous, you are certain you are safe... you feel safe because you realize nothing bad can really happen, so that allows you to feel totally free to let go and feel that great arousal again and again and again.

When you imagine how much fun it is to ride a roller coaster or any other kind of amusement park ride .. It’s like as if that ride is climbing up and up, you can feel your heart pounding with excitement, you feel you're breathing faster and faster, sometimes you're even gasping and panting you feel the blood rushing through every part of your body and as that excitement and tension is building and building, you reach the top of the ride and then as it crests, you just release it in a flood of excitement, and sometimes you're screaming you're so turned on.

And you know, afterwards I thought to myself, isn't that the totally accurate description of your ideal attraction to another person. You know that kind of wonderful click right there (right in the center of who you are) that just makes you feel totally drawn to this person and on one hand you feel totally safe and totally comfortable like you were meant to know them and as if you've known them forever.

Cuddle

I wanna cuddle with somebody. It's that simple. I want someone to hold me close and just be there with me. Of course, it can't just be anybody. I don't know who. I just know that's what I want. Someone to show affection to and enjoy being around. I know some people I wouldn't mind it being, but that isn't up to me...yet...

Life

I have been living it. And it seems I haven't cared to tell the world about it very much. I haven't anything to tell right now. I just wanted to say something. Nothing in particular, but something. Just to keep the dust from gathering and what not. It's so cold right now. I can't handle it. Well, I need to get going to the studio. Hopefully, nothing retarded happens today.

Peace,
Nasia

When a Virgo Warms Up

If a virgo warms up to you, you will discover so many wonderful layers of personality you didn't know existed.

This is true. I don't even feel like it needs an explanation.

Stuck

Every 2 months or so I find myself in this position where it feels like I'm stuck. Not even like I'm at a wall, but like I've just reached an abyss and there are no signs or directions or lights guiding me towards any particular path. There are no paths. I'm just in an empty place. I don't even know where the place is. It's strange...and confusing...and I don't really like being here, but I guess I'll find my way out in a few days as usual. This is the point where I wish someone would appear and take me up and save me from this confusion and loneliness like in the movies. I have friends that try. I have friends that really want to. But they are not in any position to be trying to save me from anything. It's ok to wish for some adorable, successful guy to just come knocking at your door and just fall in love with you right? Sounds like something from those novels women read. I've never read one of those. But I think I'd be pretty good at writing one if I really wanted to. I don't. I just want to not have to think for once. To just love and be loved. Maybe that's why I'm not trying very hard to get out of this house anymore. I don't have to think so much as just keep it clean. I'm not trying to take the easy way out. But to me, this is the most efficient way I guess. Another rent to pay and more bills would not make my life any easier. I'm happy with my space here. I'm happy with the freedoms I have. I'm just unhappy with myself I guess. I've disappointed myself somewhere down the line. I feel like I should still be in school, becoming a doctor or some other well-paid member of society. I love animation, but it wasn't the most stable choice to make. I just have a habit of not caring about whether or not I've put in enough time doing it. It's become less of a passion and more of a hobby I do when I don't feel like playing my guitar or blogging. And this is why I wish I had that someone. Just being with them would allow me to temporarily release myself from all of my worries and just be loved. Or maybe I'll worry about them more than I worry about myself. I don't need to worry about myself. I know in the end I'll have it all handled. Even if they'll have it handled in the end too, I like to have someone else to think about and look forward to seeing at the end of the day. To cuddle and watch movies with.

I keep saying I don't want to be in a relationship. What I really mean is that I don't want to have to deal with someone else again if it doesn't work out. I just want to find the right one and get on with it. And I know that's impossible, but what isn't impossible is having a conversation with someone and knowing by the end of the convo that you would really like to know more about this person or hang out with them or something. I don't know. A lot of the time what happens is by the end of the convo I'm kind of bored or uncomfortable or I just think this person would make a good friend, but not someone I'd want to date.

How do I know this? Well, from my own experiences. I know what I DON'T want.

It's very confusing when the same people that tell me that I deserve so much also tell me I have high standards...

Blah...

Peace,
Nasia

Losing It

I think I'm losing it. What is IT? That feeling of love. I feel like the last plane has departed from my heart and the terminals have all closed down. Nothing coming in. Nothing going out. I still feel happy, but I feel like I won't be falling in any kind of love with any kind of guy any kind of soon. It's strange to know what that feels like. I guess I'll be spending the rest of this year partner-less. I'm left to me, myself, and I. That's acceptable though. I don't NEED to be in love. I don't NEED a partner. It's just a nice feeling to have. When it comes again, I will be very appreciative. And whoever it comes with will be very lucky to have been able to reopen that door.

Trusis,
Mouse

Bus and Train People

I often run into a lot of interesting people on the bus and train. This post will be dedicated to them...

5/17
I love the people that jam out to their iPods. They walk to the beat and bob their heads. Some even rap and sing along with it. They live life.

There was this dude who's pecs were so big he couldn't put his arms down so he walked like a pigeon does with its chest out. He also kept waving his hand like he was allowing the train conductor to proceed with closing the doors every time they announced the doors were closing. Strange dude. He was also cussing someone out because pecs guy was standing where the bikes go and a guy wanted to put his bike there but pecs guy was being an a$$ and wouldn't let him so he had to stand in the middle of the aisle with his bike while pecs guy let out some of his childhood butt frustration on the poor bike dude. Sad day for them. After bike dude left, pecs guy stood in front of the door, blocking people from getting on and off so they just kind of squeezed past him. I just wanted to be like dude, your boobs are not doors. People can't get past you, but I was too into my music and OMG

There was this puppy outside the train. I was thinking about this puppy. MOST ADORABLE PUPPY EVER! First time I fell in love at first sight. I saw him on the sidewalk and was struck. I almost got off the train to go get him and take him home, but my mom probably would have killed me for bringing home another animal with the 3 we already have, plus the ones next door. Ah! He was sooooo cute though. If he's still there when I go home, I'm gonna grab him up. I don't even care. XD I hope he isn't though and was just chilling outside of his own house. I didn't see anyone else around though. Poor little dude.

5/18
So I'm standing at the station waiting for the train and decide to walk down to the other end like I always do and the spot where I decide to land was about 2 feet from this old black dude. He turned and caught eye contact with me and out of respect I made a slight grin and nodded and went back to my music, nodding my head and tapping my foot. I noticed he hadn't turned back around and looked up slightly and he was still looking at me. I grinned again and started to turn away from him, but he started saying something. I thought he was gonna ask for help getting somewhere 'cause that's what a lot of people seem to ask me, as though I know my way around or something. I took out an earphone and listened. To sum it all up, he wanted to get to know me and get my number and meet up some time. He was like...60! So, he gives me his number and asks me if I remembered it. His name was Melvin. Watch out for old black dudes named Melvin riding the train. He was talking about me coming to pick him up and stuff. I was like uh, sorry dude. So the train arrives and he's like come on. I follow him to the door and just as he gets in and some people get between us, I book it to the next train car. I was NOT about to be talking to this old dude having to make up stuff about where I was going and what not. Man...it was really quite amusing when I got in the next car though 'cause he was still talking to me when I decided to run. Probably turned around and saw I was gone and was like damn... XD Old creeper...

Also, I didn't see the puppy again. I'm not sure if I should be happy or sad about that. 'Cause if he was still there that would mean he spent all night there and I could have saved him! But since he wasn't, maybe he actually belonged to someone and I would have looked dumb trying to take home someone else's puppy. Ah well, I hope you're safe little puppy.